Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Paradigm Shift...

In an attempt to tell you where I was the other night, I’d like to start with this.
Stay with me, it might take me a few posts to do so.

From Wikipedia
The term "paradigm shift": a radical change in personal beliefs, complex systems or organizations, replacing the former way of thinking or organizing with a radically different way of thinking or organizing.

This is the “buzz phrase” that has made it’s way around town and back these past 10 years. Lately I have been pondering the “big” learning moments in my 30+ year existence. (I won’t tell you how many pluses belong there!)
These moments all fit inside the paradigm shift category. I believed one way, strongly, until I was shown the light.

I’ll briefly describe one “learning” Shift.

Our oldest was only 10 months old and he had been teething, cranky and was cranking out the dirty diapers with amazing speed. My husband and I were even surprised to find out he could easily scale the walls of his crib and get out of his room. My little guy still wasn’t sleeping through the night and things were stressful. There isn’t a mom out there that can’t see how deprivation of sleep could be a source of torture. During this, one afternoon after naps I turned the knob to his room and I will never forget what I saw. His little body was inside his crib, but his head was outside. His neck was caught between the sliding rail and the headboard of his bed and he was slowly strangling. His eyes were swollen shut, he was barely breathing and his lips were blue.

I won’t say more here other than after we got to the hospital and I was able to leave my husband with him to have a breather in the bathroom I had my “paradigm shift”. No longer was the crankiness, dirty diapers or sleepless nights an issue. I wanted my little one back. Like the icons on an iphone, my mind had instantly rearranged my priorities. My finger had dragged, stinky diapers, crankiness, no sleep and the talk I needed to give at church the next week to the insignificant area of concerns within an instant. The icon of a healthy baby to raise became large and the only thing on my screen. In fact I will share one part of my prayer to my Father in Heaven; “please let me change more of his dirty diapers, please!” What before was becoming a chore, now I saw as a blessing. I was pleading with all my strength to have that opportunity again.

I am pleased to say that this sweet baby is now a thriving 11 year old. I’m not the perfect mom, he will tell you that I’m sure. And I’m not suggesting that after that things weren’t tough. But I will tell you that with my “learning shift” difficult situations were easier to handle with my “icons” in order.

{and no, I don’t have an iphone}


Christine said...

I had a similar "paradigm shift" a few years ago. It was following a horrific Relief Society event that I was over where I had put my heart, soul and too much time and everything fell apart complete with ladies copping attitude and complaining to me as it was happening. I woke up the next morning in a fog of depression and self pity. Half way through the day Ashley fell off the counter to land flat on her back. Her cries were weak and she kept trying to fall asleep. I was frantic and brought her to urgent care for x-rays thinking the worst. All the sudden everything that had bothered me before was completely insignificant and I stopped worrying about myself and worried about Ashley. Luckily she ended up being fine but it was enough to jolt me out of my self pity and bitterness and remind me whats important in life and move on with a better perspective.

loubige said...

Shawna...thank you for the reminder--my kids (and husband) are my number #1 priority...even if they are driving me crazy sometimes. About 4 years ago we had to take Curran to the hospital for eating too much "candy" he climbed up into the tall cupboards where we keep medicine and ate almost an entire box b/c they looked like sweetarts.(we figured out) Very scary--they just had Jon stay in the ER room to make sure Curran didn't stop breathing while he was in his medicinal induced sleep.

sHaWna in Costa Rica baby! said...

Christine and Lou-

I know you get what I'm trying to explain. So scary!
I remember a talk I had to give in church that Sunday was my HUGE worry. After Troy's situation, I just got up and gave the talk, no concerns about it. Interesting huh?

Lara said...

I get it, Shawna. I've had my share of paradigm shifts. But somehow, I still need reminders every once in a while, so I'm not sure if they were true shifts in thinking....

Christina said...

wow-that IS a paradigm shift! jon has really been my only shift so far..ive never had any scary experiences with any of my children..a blessing.